Stop Pelting The Male Feminists With Eggs

NRGCult | Sunday, 6 October 2019 |

Katie Shox

^^^If you don't blow your own trumpet...

I'd first like to thank everyone for making the first three nights of The Seductrist a resounding success. We've worked hard to turn our play into one of 2019's best stage productions, and it's been very rewarding to get such a great reception.

However, what we saw from certain members of the audience last night was wholly unacceptable, and we are not going to tolerate such behaviour. Pop band The Male Feminists have kindly stepped up as a support act for our play, after an increasing number of people were arriving early and being left with no entertainment between 8pm and 9pm. They have not asked for any payment or expenses. DO NOT PELT THEM WITH EGGS.

The Seductrist: Victoria Druggs to Bare All in New Stage Play

NRGCult | Friday, 27 September 2019 |

Simon Shorrill

It opens on 1st October, runs four nights a week for a month, and is expected to break all periodical attendance records at Serenextis. Yes, The Seductrist is finally ready to hit the stage, and it's going to blow your socks off.

In a faster, grittier and even sexier sequel to The Draculist, Victoria Druggs reprises her acclaimed stage role as Lavinia de Sade. In The Draculist, she fought the evil power of Count Dracula with feminism and cake-making skills. But now she's fighting feMRAs, and you won't believe what happens when she flings open her cape...

e-Library: The Woman Who Rinses Rich Men - Through Their Wives

NRGCult | Monday, 22 July 2019 |

Victoria Druggs

His Money, Her Pleasure - by Ashby D Canterbury

Having finally torn ourselves away from the strenuous task of sitting on our arses watching netball matches, we thought we'd better open this e-library we've been promising for a month.

It's not just a generic collection of widely available rejects. Most of the books are currently exclusive to NRGCult. They're largely written by women who normally self publish and sell at feminist protest events. Many titles were originally released as limited runs of hard copies, and have either sold out, or been thrown at the police until stocks were exhausted.

But it's actually a brand new book with which we headline the launch. As an introductory promotion, we're particularly proud to be able to offer His Money, Her Pleasure by Ashby D Canterbury. Ashby created a buzz with her innovation in the field of proxied rinsing, and she discusses her tactics in depth in her amazing book.

England's Oldest Surviving UFO is De-Classified

NRGCult | Thursday, 18 July 2019 |

Gayle Phabbe
Technology Executive

It has a long history, dating back to the 1960s, but the distinctive UFO which has appeared to many residents of Worcestershire, Gloucestershire and Oxfordshire, also now has a future - thanks to de-classification and a tech development deal.

Although UFOs are commonly associated with alien life, their origin is entirely terrestrial. Assuming a UFO exists, and is not just a figment of 8x-over-the-legal-limit-van-driver's imagination, it's been built by humans, on Earth.

One of the typical difficulties in substantiating this, is that the people who build UFOs are normally working under a non-diclosure order on pain of death, and will therefore never admit that the craft exists. That's why so many people think aliens build UFOs. If no human will admit to building one, it must have been some tin-headed creature from GN-z11, right?

But one long-running mystery has now been solved, as a formerly secret craft is exempted from its original non-disclosure agreement. That means we can now talk about this once puzzling flying object, and provide a fascinating insight into its history.

How Entertainers Induce Hypnotic Trance

NRGCult | Wednesday, 10 July 2019 |

Katie Shox

Sultra Knight. In a trance, apparently.

Word (and, it seems, fear) of Sultra Knight and her potato on a string, has spread halfway around Worcestershire. Take a trip into town with our guru of suggestive control, and it's now almost inevitable that if one highly-sexed young male cat calls her, his half-embarrassed mate will rather more quietly interject; "That's the one who hypno-dommes saddos with a baked spud".

But can people really be placed into a trance, for entertainment purposes, in the blink of an eye or at the swing of a potato? And if so, how?

That's exactly what Sultra set out to explain in her talk at Serenextis last night. I'm going to quote some sections from her address, but if you're hoping for anything but hard reality here, stop reading now...

New Staff & Initiatives

NRGCult | Thursday, 4 July 2019 |

Victoria Druggs
Director of Strategy

Tech genius Gayle Phabbe joins NRGCult!!!

As NRGCult regroups after the Solstice break, we're implementing some of the initiatives we came up with whilst lying face down, wined up to the eyeballs, in a field full of Neolithic rocks.

Additionally, we're absolutely thrilled to announce that tech innovator Gayle Phabbe has joined us on a part time basis. Gayle is best known for her groundbreaking work with supernatural thought-mapping, and we know her amazing tech ingenuity will help us take NRGCult into a totally different league.

FeMRA Crowdfunding Campaign For Incels

NRGCult | Tuesday, 25 June 2019 |

Shandi Beever
Sex Magician

Cavendish Love is one of the two feMRAs who have infiltrated NRGCult.

It has been brought to our attention that two women, going under the names of Bunty McPickles and Cavendish Love, have been using their NRGCult memberships to harass male members for donations to a crowdfunding campaign.

Their campaign professes to be a collection for shampoo, which they claim they would distribute for free to Conservative women. They say each bottle of shampoo will be dispatched with a T-shirt that carries the slogan:

"Don't Despair. Sniff My Hair!".

The ultimate goal, say McPickles and Love, is to prevent male suicide through "properly designated and clearly identifiable hair-sniffing options". At the top of this post, you can see the meme being spread by Cavendish Love. It says...

"If sniffing my hair can prevent an incel from throwing himself into the sea and being eaten by a whale, then let's crowdfund shampoo."

Donations to our own funding initiatives have collapsed since these two Trump/Osteen-worshipping cranks began messaging you.

We've now revoked their memberships, but it appears Love has been harvesting your email addresses and is now sending out her relentless spam directly.

Meanwhile, McPickles is alleging our exclusive sugar substitute is a mind-altering drug. Naccharin, she says, is: "a powerful pharmaceutical pussy whip". A drug which turns men into, quote: "servile, pseudo-masculoid doormats who will drop and squat for any pouting wench who walks around with her knickers on show". She is claiming that we purposely developed Naccharin as a means to enslave men as feminist lackeys. The fact that Jack Smart used to have 18 Naccharins in every coffee, and has never done anything remotely useful for a woman in his life, seems to have escaped her notice.