Just So You Know...

NRGCult | Saturday, 16 March 2019 |

Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

For the benefit of anyone who doesn't know me, I'm Shandi's sister and I worked at NRGCult as a Spellcraft Apprentice from September 2018 until last month, when I left to run a yoga injury claim line from a European ashram. But business was too slow for someone who's addicted to jelly babies, caffeine & sodium benzoate, so now I'm back at NRGCult as Divisional Manager.

I'm just pissing in to reintroduce myself.



Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

*Popping in. Can Eddie look at the digital rewriter thing please?

Matthew Widehead
Cult Member

Welcome back Jess. How many divisional managers are there?

Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

Just me.

Ed Case
Cult Member

So how is it a divisional manager job if there's just one division?

Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

There's not one division. There's 3.

Ed Case
Cult Member

So they're still hiring managers for the other divisions?

Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

Okay, let me explain this in full cuz otherwise it's gunna get silly.

I manage all 3 Divisions. Normal, Paranormal & Subnormal. Plus there's a Divisional Supervision Division, which oversees the other 3 Divisions, & starting from Monday I will also ruin that.

Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

*Run. Not ruin.

Graham Splain
Cult Member

So I think what you're saying (in essence), is that you have four jobs. Not only do you manage all three divisions (three jobs), but you also supervise yourself (one more job, which adds up to a total of four).

Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

Exactly.

Jack Smart
Ex-staff

Couldn't they just give you one job that manages everything and call you 'The Manager'?

Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

When you go to the theatre to see a play, is there just one character called 'The Play', & that character just talks to themself all the way through?

Jack Smart
Ex-staff

Um..... no. But they get different people to play all the different characters.

Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

But do they really need to get more than one person?

Jack Smart
Ex-staff

Yes.

Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

Why?

Jack Smart
Ex-staff

Because if there was a fight it would look stupid with just one person grabbing himself by the throat and throwing himself on the floor.

Jessame Beever
Divisional Manager

Okay so people obviously aren't taking my career seriously. Good night.